I’ve learned a good chunk of things by watching others. People watching is my favorite thing. It’s kind of like a hobby. No, I don’t go pull up a chair at the park and watch or sit on the bench at Walmart. I just like to notice others and my surroundings when out and about.
I’ve learned that the best burger is one that hasn’t been pressed.
I’ve learned that the way parents look at their babies or toddlers really shows how much they love them. I.e when they look them in the eyes, hold their hands, or smile.
I’ve learned that the people closest to you hold the biggest secrets.
I’ve learned that a four way stop people lose IQ points and alpha personalities, well they really take charge—even when it’s not their turn.
I’ve learned that the biggest people aren’t always the slowest.
From a young age I wanted to be a detective. And for years I kinda switched gears and wanted to be a teacher—until I didn’t want to deal with children’s parents. Then I got back on track to be a cop. Well, I had always known that being self aware and aware of my surroundings was my best trait. It came in handy for sports. I could see the basketball court so well. I could pick the open spots, flash, drive the lane, read the rebound. In softball I could read the field as well. I could pick other coaches signs. I could read when the runners were stealing* I was a catcher* and when hitting I could/can read when the outfielders came in or sat on the fence. It is just one of my better skills. So it’s come natural to me.
Growing up I also learned a lot from watching my parents. Two of the most selfless people I know. I watched when my mom was in a rough patch with us kids being out of a job, have to tell us “no” to candy or Lunchables because she couldn’t afford it. Guys, I don’t think you know my mom. She never says “no.” She goes about saying it other ways but, “no” isn’t her favorite word, it’s second to “hate.” I’ll explain in a minute.
See my mother, busted her ass along with my dad to provide a great life for us 7 kids. We always had shoes, clothes, a roof over our heads, and occasionally a great meal-if my ma wasn’t cooking. Lol. That adds up. My parents gave us such a great life. 5 of us now have scuba licenses, 3 went on 2 year missions-funded by my parents and a couple others- 5 of us went to college-3 graduated so far. All of us kids were on some sort of travel sports team. Yeah we’re all pretty good.
They taught us that to give means more than to hand money or physical items. It meant that not everything you do for someone needs to be recognized. My parents taught me two of the biggest lessons: 1, Compassion and service are the two greatest things a person can have..and with faith being the greatest. 2, never give up.
My dad taught me that you can have some of the darkest times and be at the lowest in your life and still be a light. My dad taught me that shit happens and sometimes it ends up on your doorstep in a bag on fire. Don’t step on it go around. My mom taught me that you can’t ever hate your family. You can dislike them but you have to love them. Haha.
My parents never really sat us kids down, or me for that fact, and gave us lessons on this stuff. We just watched as it all unfurled. I watched as two of the strongest people went through the worst of times, got new starts, and back again, to now offering us kids money when we visit...or to fill up our gas guzzling vehicles. They never gave up. And they are STILL making sure we have the best life.
I learned the hardest lessons on my own. I learned that in the darkest of times you do think that thought. You know what I’m talking about. If not, you haven’t been there and lucky you. I learned that sometimes the closest people to you, they hurt you the most. I learned that being big bad ass Mel Flo comes along with people not thinking I have a heart. You’re either tender-hearted or stone cold tough ass. And somehow I feel I need to be in the middle haha.
I’ve learned that I’m the person who would give my life, not just for my family, but for a stranger. It’s just who I am. I do not enjoy others being sad or hurt. I’ve learned that the most heartless people will hurt the people closest to you.
The loneliest people... well they tend to be the kindest.
The saddest people... they smile the brightest.
And the most damaged people.. they are the wisest.
I’ve seen people be dirt poor and give their last dollar to someone who was hungry. I’ve witnessed people scraping by paycheck to paycheck spend a few extra bucks for the dude sitting by the freeway with a sign. I’ve witnessed my grandfather take in a man who was train hopping and got washed up in a storm. He gave that man a place to live. He gave him clothes and food for nearly a month until he earned enough for a greyhound ticket to Cali. That was the greatest summer I got to have. And my grandfather, he was a great man.
I’m only 24, working on 25 here. Pretty sure I’ve had about 13 mid life crisis in the last 3 years. And I’ve learned that ya gotta keep going. Ya gotta keep trucking along. I had a close friend kill himself, I was one of the firsts to a car crash where I walked to the drivers side of a truck to see a man with his face halfway peeled off. And he was cracking jokes. I’ve watched someone try to jump off a building. And many others. But I’ve also held my nephew in my arms the night he was born and realized how great life is. I’ve driven a new Jeep off the lot with my name on the title with a big ass smile on my face. I’ve laughed until I’ve cried and cried until I laughed. I’ve broken bones and gotten stitches. I’ve gone to school and I’ve played hooky. Through all of this I’ve learned. I've learned who I am and why I’m here. I’ve learned that in the quietest of moments we learn the most.
Get out and learn from experience. Sit back and watch. Either way do something.
Xo,
MelFlo
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